Have Some Libel

Pete Seeger touches kids.

Tim Robbins has leprosy.

Tim Curry gave Tim Robbins leprosy.

Robert Pollard is illiterate.

Lady Gaga is not a dude.

Jessica Simpson got gang-banged by the 2002 Canadian Olympic hockey team, in 1978.

Ed Simpson was the D.C. sniper.

Billy Bob Thornton didn’t know he was being filmed during “Slingblade”.

Barack Obama shot Malcolm X.

Barbara Walters does not have a human circulatory system.

Cigarettes are actually good for you.  Sam Elliott has been keeping this information suppressed since c. 1640.

Brian Kantorski is an immortal incubus.  He is estimated to be nearly 9000 years old.

Coleman Howes has a book fetish.

Geoff Howes has a foot fetish.

I am actually a composite of old parts from Commodore 64s and Betamax cassettes.

Sandro Botticelli and Mark Twain were actually the same person, and he (they) plagiarized William Shakespeare, who was the one who truly painted “The Calumny of Apelles”.  The irony of it all killed off all the dinosaurs, who created man and knew in advance all of human history.

© 1733, Chupacavraz